I dreamed of January 26th. I dreamed of Janine Rose.

I'm trying to find the words to express every thing that lives inside me for you. Sometimes, I wish you could come into my heart and know that God made me with you in it. Mom tells me she wishes I could do the same with her. So I'd know the depths of her Love for me. We're so meant to be. Soul mates. Mom, Dad, Me, you and Sam. He created us to fit together in this perfect way. I wish I could travel back in time and experience you again and again. I'd take everything with it. I'd live all my hard ships again just to live all those years once again. When I was little, Mom and I used to lay on the bed and talk about you like you existed. At this time, the doctors told Mom I would be her only child and she wouldn't be able to get pregnant again. But we'd dream about you anyway. Mom was probably heartbroken and wondered if it was true. But you were already mine. I deeply yearned for you. My little 4 year old heart already loved you and couldn't wait for you to be born and be MY little sister. I'd beg Mom for you. And when you finally came, I fell in Love for the very first time. 6 years old, my heart knew benevolence. To deeply Love and care for something so much you can't even take it. I wanted to hold you and kiss and smell you ALL day. I was SO proud. I can't even verbalize how precious you are to me. How precious you've always been. Like this treasure. This jewel. That is so, so priceless. Made just for me. MY little sister. I wish I could give you more. I'd give you everything. I wish I could go back and give you even more from the moment you were born until now. I hate that I'm so far away from you. But I feel you like your here. Please feel me tomorrow like I'm there. On one of the best days that EVER happened to me. Your life is a planet in my universe. You orbit in my solar system. My sun shines on you. Look up at night at the stars and know how much of a big deal you are to me. Tomorrow might be just another birthday to you, but it marks an anniversary of a GREAT gift given to me. That I can't be thankful enough for.

Split my chest open and look inside...you'll see yourself. Because you are what my heart looks like. I bet if you went back and looked in it the day I was born, you'd see yourself even then. I was born with you in me. And you will be in me for eternity!

Here's to you Janine Rose! My Love!

Ladies and gentleman...THIS is what my heart looks like.
MLB